Podcasting with Purpose for Life Coaches

214 Your Only Obligation is to be Unapologetically in Your Own Skin

January 12, 2023 Kara Gott Warner
Podcasting with Purpose for Life Coaches
214 Your Only Obligation is to be Unapologetically in Your Own Skin
Show Notes Transcript

I'm brining you another-off-the-cuff, barebones, no notes episode. Today I felt there was a calling for me to record something straight-up simple to prove the point as I do again and again ... we don't need fancy scripts, notes, or timestamps to be a successful podcaster with a capital P.

In this episode, we're going to explore an issue I often see with podcasters getting out of their lane, comparing and despairing. This episode is asking you to step courageously into your sovereign self.


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Alright. Let's get started with today's episode.

You're listening to Podcasting with Purpose for Life Coaches. My name is Kara Gott Warner, the podcasting coach for coaches.

I believe that a podcast is a powerful medium for creating connection and community, and inside every conversation is the potential for transformation. So, let's get started on yours. Enjoy the episode.

Hey, so I am recording this episode the second week of January, and by the way, this is going to be a short one. It's going to be a short one because, I'm the kind of person, especially with my podcast, I love to live in the breakthrough.

I love to share what's happening in the breakthrough. When I say breakthrough, I really mean the moment because that's what's breaking through means, and sometimes, because of they're always pretty real and strong in our life, obviously, but there are things that come up and maybe our schedule can be shifted and we don't have to create, as I call it, “schedule shame.”

Maybe that phrase is out there, but like, I wrote that down one day in my journal and I'm like, “that's pretty ridiculous that I might shame myself because I didn't check the things off the list.” And it might be very subtle shame, you know, sneaky, sneaky shame. But I think that's a whole other podcast episode and maybe it's one I've already discussed here on this podcast.

So, but what I'm doing is I'm recording off the cuff, I have no notes today. Usually, I have bullet points. I'm not a big script writer, but today I felt there was a calling for me to record something simple, short, you know, and I felt like the topic that I had planned wasn't a good fit for this week.

And I'm always willing to step back and look at things for what the moment is sharing, or what the moment is saying, this is what you need, because I see my weeks in sort of these little mini chapters. Things that happen and things always seem to happen in threes. Maybe they come in fours and fives, but you know that saying. Things come in threes. I was just thinking of that saying “third time's a charm,” but that's not really how this applies. 

This mystical notion of things coming in threes, because three, number three is kind of an auspicious mystical number in that way with threes. We kind of do a lot of things in threes, don't we? 

So, what I want to do is I want to share something. I want to share a passage from a book that I'm reading, the beginning of this year, January 1st. It's a book that you read one entry for that day, and you just read a couple pages and it's really great. It’s called The Book of Awakening and it's not what I thought it was going to be, although I'm really happy that it's different and it's refreshing.

So, it's a book about being present in the life that you have. It's by Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening. It’s a very poetic way of talking about how to be mindful each day. It's not spewing the usual mindfulness kind of jargon or verbiage, and I just find it to be very refreshing. And actually, this book was written 20 years ago, so it's been around, it's the 20th anniversary edition, so it's just been very eye-opening book. 

So, I'm going to read the entry for January 10th, and then I'm going to reflect a little bit on it with the last few minutes that I have here before I actually have to move on with my day and rouse my son up from his slumber so he can wake up and get ready for school.

Okay, so this is the January 10th entry from the The Book of Awakening. And this is a reading from the Talmud. 

“When a Akiba was on his deathbed, he bemoaned to his rabbi that he felt he was a failure. His rabbi moved closer and asked why and Akiba confessed that he had not lived a life like Moses.The poor man began to cry, admitting that he feared God's judgment at this. His rabbi leaned into his ear and whispered, God will not judge Akiba for not being Moses. God will judge akiba for not being Akiba.”

Oh, that's so good, right? And then I'm going to read this first paragraph from the book that Mark Nepo wrote …

“We are born with only one obligation. To be completely who we are. How much of our time is spent comparing ourselves to others, dead or alive? This is encouraged as necessary in the pursuit of excellence.” 

Okay, I'm just going to pause here for a second. Like, who the hell said that, right? I mean, it's almost like ingrained into our brains. Like it's almost like the meat cleaver that Jen Sincero uses in as an analogy in her book You Are a Badass, that we have these thoughts from childhood or maybe just from, you know, being in an online business. Or being a coach and subscribing to certain things that, to a degree, like almost we believe them. It's like we're in a cult or something. 

Not to say that thing that we believe in, or we're following is a cult, but it's like we, we believe it's so much that we go outside of our own intuitive hits that tell us otherwise. 

Okay, I'm going to continue. “Yet, a flower in its excellence does not yearn to be a fish. And a fish in its unmanaged elegance does not long to be a tiger, but we humans find ourselves always falling into the dream of another life, or we secretly aspire to the fortune or fame of people. When feeling badly about ourselves, we often try on other skins rather than understand and care for our own.” 

My gosh. Right? So, it's like we become a little bit like outside of our own body, but like in a bad way, when we think of what it is that we want or think we need to do, we are doing something because we think we need to, but at our core, we don't want to.

I can only go by what I see, especially when it comes to podcasting. I've been doing this now for over nine years, but I see this thing, this behavior that people go into their podcasting experience based on what someone else has done.

And in many in many cases it's because that particular person has found success or they have, you know, a million downloads or whatever. But the way that they do things, their experience, the behind the scenes nuanced stuff, it could be drastically different than your experience. And if your experience is saying, “no, I don't want to do it that way, it feels icky inside my body.”

And now there's a difference between doing a thing because you need to do it. Like, you know, if you're avoiding something, there's a big difference between doing the thing that you feel like you know you need to do. It's a little busy work, but it's intense work, but it's really worthy work because it's in the direction of your dream, of what you want.

But then if you're doing things continuously that feel icky and just not in alignment with who you are, then it is a call to action for you to take a look at that, right? 

And if that's with your podcast, but it doesn't matter what it is with anything. It's like if you're like showing up and recording episodes, and you're just putting out, you're churning things out because you're like, well, “this is what I do and you know, I'm marketing my business and what the hell am I going to talk about today?”

Or “I'm going to talk about this thing because it's on the list and I put it on the list. And so that's what I'm going to talk about.” Even if it's something you don't connect with, and that's exactly what I'm doing today. I had a thing on my list, and I really do want to talk about, but today is not the day.

Today felt like the day to talk about this thing that I see that is really a challenge for a lot of people and, and that thing that I said in this entry is, you know, finding ourselves falling into the dream of another life, or we secretly aspire to the fortune or fame of people we don't even know.

So that's something to look at, right? Because if you're yearnings in your heart and the reason why you are doing a podcast is different than what you're hearing others tell you, your wisdom takes precedence, right? Your number one advisor, who is your number one advisor? Who is it? 

I'm pausing to give you time to reflect on that because you're in your brain.

You might be thinking, “oh, it's so-and-so. Oh, it's that person instead of … no, no.” That number one advisor is you. It’s your wisdom that holds the key to exactly what you need in the exact moment. And, and the fact that you were born, the truth that you were born with only one obligation to be completely who you are, in your life, in your business behind the microphone because that my friend, is how you will move mountains.

Okay, that's all I got. Have a good day. See you next time.